Sticks and stones may break my bones...

It has been over a year since I have written in this blog. My husband and I have now been married for just over three years. We have a good life with our dog Draco and our friends and family. 

I recently broke my leg in two places (on Easter Sunday to be exact). I broke my ankle and Fibula. I am sad to report that I am able to run until at least September! However, I can walk again on March 28. I am so very excited to finally be getting out of this apartment. I have to say, We have had a lot of help from friends and family. I know prayers have been said for my husband and I and meals have been brought every so often to ease the burden on my husband. The most appreciated thing though, I have had a few visitors. I love visitors. Having been stuck in the apartment 24/7 (aside from the occasional doctors appointment) has taken a toll on me emotionally. Those that have visited or called have been a really big help in that department.

My husband has been busy lately. He has been going to work and then coming home only to have to help me with practically everything. God bless that man. I love him so much. Thank you all for the kind thoughts!

giving is better than receiving.

Yesterday was my two year anniversary with my husband. I had a nice dinner planned out and a fabulous desert. Then my husband took over and surprised me by taking me to Outback :) I do love my husband. I dote on him quite a bit. Buuuut he deserves it. I wish he could just see how much he means to me. I hope that we have many more years together on this Earth. Also, I would like to mention again my project idea for the quilts. I haven't had the best response outside of family. I have had two friends agree to help. It would really mean alot to me if more of my friends could find the time to find material to donate (even if it is just old blankets or old clothing). I plan on donating the blankets to the local shelter and (if I have enough made) to the hospital. So please, anything would help. Even just a little bit of thread or just sharing my project idea with others. Please help me out.

No greater gift

I am doing a project this year. I would like to know if any of my friends know how to quilt or have extra material lying around (any kind of material). I want to make blankets to either give to a local shelter or the hospital. Please Please Please message me if you are interested. You wouldn't have to do much. Just make a square for the quilt or send some material (again stuff you already have lying around). I would be so so grateful and may even make you something in return. I will be making the donations of the blankets at the end of November or beginning of December. This is a way for everyone to get involved without spending money. so please if you have time I would really like for all my friends to participate. Also if you know someone who would be interested please let them know and let me know

Let it snow

So in the eighteenth I flew into Utah to visit Matt and Jen and their kiddos. I have been having so much fun. That first Sunday there was a lot of snow on the ground and I got to make my first snowman and snow angel. It was so much fun. The girls managed to get snow down my Jeans while we were throwing snow balls. I have been having so much fun. I am ready to go home but not quite ready to leave lol. I go home on Tuesday. Hopefully I will get to see some more snow before then.

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My vday gift

I love my husband. He truly is the best.

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Fun with Jaime and Christine

Last weekend, Brian and I went to see my dear friend Jaime. On Friday went to the mall and looked at puppies. Saturday Christine and her boyfriend joined us. We went to Walmart,.got pizza, and went bowling. Draco got to see his friendDouglas again. They had so much fun. He slept all day Monday. I can't wait to go see Jaime again. It is always a fun time whenever we get to hang out with her. I will post pictures of the puppies sometime this weekend

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My tired puppy

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Coming clean

So many of you know that I was recently diagnosed with severe clinical depression. We think I have had it since about high school. We think this because I was always down on myself and always felt like everyone was against me. Also I had been hurting myself from the age of 15 to about 23. I want to apologize to anyone that I may have hurt. For those of you who don't know and those who think depression is just an excuse (I used to think this way) depression is a chemical imbalance in your brain that makes you act and feel differently. It is easily fixed with antidepressants. Why am I writing this blog? Well the answer is that I want to come clean. I do not feel like I have to be ashamed of having depression. So. I have come clean. And I hope you all can forgive me of I have hurt you in anyone or for my craziness during the time that I was not on any medication.

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Prayer request

Hey guys. I have a simple request. I have a friend whose dad is not doing so well. She and her family could really use your help. All I am asking for is prayers. If you guys could take a few minutes out of your day to pray for them, I would really appreciate it. Thanks in advanced.

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Gift Of A Friend

Normally I would use song lyrics as a title to my posts. But I couldn't find any that fit with the post I am making so I used the song title Gift Of A Friend. The song is sung by Demi Lovato. I have some amazing news. My wonderful sister Ella is getting married. Plus she has asked me to be Matron of Honor. The reason for my title is because of Ella. I have known her for over eight years. She is an amazing person and a wonderful sister and I am so happy for her and wish her the best of luck. Ella does this thing for Thanksgiving where she posts something she is Grateful for everyday. Well actually a few things lol. I would like to do this too and I encourage all of my friends to do the same as it is a way for us to remember all the good things in our lives.

I am grateful for:
1. My awesome and very loving husband
2. My sister Ella
3. My amazing sisters in law. Echo and Jen
4. My puppy Draco
5. My friend Kate

Well that is all for today. I will try to keep up with this blog from now on.

I'm beautiful in my way cause God makes no mistakes

Hi! I am going to say something that has been bugging me for a while now. I. Don't. Care. I found out recently who my true friends are and I am shocked at how few there are. But in the same sense, I am grateful for that few. I have been going crazy all my life trying to please EVERYONE. The only people I have to please is myself and my Heavenly Father. Well, and my husband. I have come to the conclusion that life is hard and that's just the way it is going to be. I do want to say thank you to the people who have been there for me and I want you to know that I will ALWAYS be there for you. My sisters Echo and Jen have been amazing and extremely understanding even though sometimes, I really don't deserve it. My friends Jaime and Christine have BEEN like sisters to me and I really appreciate it. Thank you so much. You guys have no idea how it felt to know that I just had to text you and my whole day would be better somehow. Some good news. I might get the opportunity to go to Utah this winter. I am a bit excited about that. School has been going well and I am so glad that I FINALLY took some time for me. I am happy with my choice to go back to school and am grateful to those who understood that it was important to me. Brian has been an amazing support system. I am grateful for that. Draco is doing well. He will be a year old next month :) Oh! And we will be moving in December! We will be closer to Clearwater. I will be closer to my friend Christine which will be awesome. Again thank you guys for being such amazing friends!

A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell them for a dollar

I haven't posted in a while. In fact it has been so long that I am sure noone reads our blog anymore. LOL. I had been so busy. I recently quit my job. It has been almost a month. Almost. I am going back to school. I am going full time. I am quiet excited about that. my life is pretty boring. Draco is getting big :) He will be a year old in October. We are considering getting another puppy. Draco loves other dogs.

Brian had his sleep study last night so I got to spend some time with my friend Christine. it was nice. I hadn't had a girls day (or night) in a long time and I was way overdue. We had pizza Ice cream and soda and watched Camp Rock.

I also got to hang out with my friend Kate this past weekend. Her husband works with Brian. It was nice to get to see them again. I have to say, I have come a long way since last year. I still have things I would LOVE to change, but I am happier than I was this time last year.

I am very grateful for my friends and family. I had a bunch of calls and messages when I sprained my ankle last week. Don't worry, I am not being a good girl and am defying the doctor by not wearing my brace because it itches. true to my nature. Also, it was really nice to not have a bunch of nosys wondering what was going on after my post last monday after seeing the doctor. I really appreciate that. I had a few people ask and one person called to make sure I was ok, which made me feel good because I was pretty depressed for a few days. And to those who asked that didn't get an answer, I'm sorry and thank you for understanding that I really didn't want to talk about it nor could I without crying. And those that I did tell, thank you also for being there for me and understanding when I said I couldn't talk about it anymore. It really is hard knowing the possibility that lies ahead. This month can not go by fast enough. I am still just as scared as ever and please forgive me if I don't feel like talking sometimes or do not answer a message right away. Those who do know what is going on can back me up when I say that I honestly have a right to be a little worried. I have to take a minute and thank my husband. I know it's childish and all, but as scared as I have been, there are a few nights where I have just cried and repeated to him how scared I am. I tried for a few days not to show it and aside from this blog entry I probably won' let it be known to anyone outside of my marriage. Even though he has to get up in the morning and I know that he is tired, he still holds me when all of it comes flooding back or lets me get close to him while I repeat how terrified I am of the worst. All in all, I could not ask for better in my life right now even with the bad stuff that is going on. And again, thank you to everyone for being there and being understanding. Thank you so much.

it was not your fault but mine

this month has been so weird. i have been sick on and off and draco was snipped. he did start his training classes and i guess that is helping even if only a bit. everyone is doing ok. brian is fine. draco has his stitches out. josh left on his mission. so i guess everyone is happy at the moment.

here is the part where i tell you how i have been. i am not looking for a pity party. just some advice. i feel so lonely. surrounded by friends and family and i feel lost. i have created this mess mmyself. but i just dont know where to go from here. i have lost faith in a sense. i have no self confidence or self esteem. and like i said... this is my fault for lwtting people walk all over me and tear me down all my life. maybe if i had a little courage to stand up for myself, not just now but a long time ago, maybe i wouldnt feel like this? eh i dont know. has anyone else felt like this? i honestly think i just need a good vacation. to just get away from it all for a while. but i dont know. and like i said, i posted this for advice, so all advice is welcome.

so back to everyone else. josh is finally in th mtc. i havent heard from him yet but i am sure he is doing well. he will be serving the lucky people in the california venture mission are.

brian finally goy his sports car a while ago. he is loving it. eventually we will trade in his old scion so i can get a car that i want.

draco. my beautiful furry child. he stinks. literally. he got snipped last week. and we were told we couldnt bathe him for fourteen days. so we cant bathe him until monday. but has healed really well. and we have started finding his baby teeth. he has been losing them for a whil. we figured he was just swallowing them. but we found one last night. rather brian found one last night.

so all in all... everyone is doing well

Tremble Little Lion Man

I have been bad about blogging. It has been awhile and there is not much to say. There is a reason for my title I promise :) We did get a new member of the family :) His name is Draco and he loves his Aunt Jaime more than anything. Also, Something good is happening for our small little family. I am not able to say right now. But I promise you it is good :) And no I am not pregnant. Our one year anniversary is coming up soon! I am so excited! It is said that the first year of marriage is the hardest. We will see. We have been making friends which is always a good thing. We started hanging out with Eric and Kate Hanna. They are a load of fun and have been married almost a year as well :) We also started hanging out with Jaime. Draco LOVES Jaime and she loves him. She has become our regular dog-sitter when we can't be home on Saturdays and we really appreciate her. All in all, our lives ARE getting better. We are eating healthier and are feeling more alive and, well, like ourselves :)

I got no time That I got to get to Where I don't need to be

I am in a Jack Johnson mood today :) He has to be one of my favorite singer/songwriters! You can not go wrong with Jack Johnson! By the way... I have some mew pictures for you. :DWe got to see some amazing people over Christmas. We saw my sister Ella, my parents, Brians parents, Chris and Echo and their girls, PLUS The Scaggs, the Wachs, and the McElroys who belong to the handsome Owen in the above photo :)

I got Brian a duo decohedron. Don't ask. It is some type of Rubix cube lol.

Brian bought me the Grims Complete Fairy Tales! :) I was so excited :) Mom Johnston got us a bread maker which I am LOVING! :) I had such a great first married Christmas with my husband. I am looking forward to many more :)

It's just my humble opinion, but it's one that I believe in.

Lately I have been feeling sort of sad. I don't know if that is the right word. To explain it better, I have noticed that others have been trying to tell me (and other people) why are opinions are completely wrong. How can't help feeling sorry for these people. Really, how sad must they be to have to tear others down and make us feel inadequate? My only wish for these people is that they find whatever it is that they are looking for in life and find true happiness. On another note... we are moving in three weeks. We are moving to Tarpon Springs. I am quite excited about this as we will be able to have others over for dinner or movie night. We will have enough room for everything that we own and then some. The only thing is we will be leaving the Seminole ward. I will truly miss my primary class and my friends there. But again.... We have space for a table so we can have people over for dinner. :D That is all for now :) I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving.

I have a smile Stretched from ear to ear

So it has been so long since I updated. I am going to summarize everything. I went to see Jen and Matt in September and I had so much fun! I love Utah and it was so nice to spend some personal time with them even though I DID miss Brian like crazy. I got a job. I work at GFI software. It is a really good job. Some people there can be real Jerks or can just be annoying but for the pay and how wonderful the job actually is it seems worth it. We attended Lore and Katies birthday party yesterday. They are growing up so fast! Also, we are moving to Tarpon Springs around the end of December. Into a really nice place called Riverside. We know some people (Rebecca and Derek) who love it there and we can now see why. And that is about it. :D I could get into details but it would take WAY to much time to put it all down :D

The worlds on fire and it's more than I can handle

This past month so much has happened. I wanted to keep it all to myself and not bother anyone with my worries. But the past couple of days i have been on the edge of tears. Literally. I finally broke down last night and I realized something. I am human. And it's okay for a human to cry. It doesn't make me weak if something happens in my life that makes me upset or sad. Sometimes things happen in our lives that we cant deal with on our own. And that is why we have our family in friends. Heavenly Father did not intend for us to go through this life alone. So why should we try to deal with our trials and worries on our own? Loved ones are there for us to lean on and Vice versa. Friendship is not something to take for granted though. Yes friends normally are more than willing to help see you through an obstacle in life but we shouldn't use our friends just for a shoulder. We should not only offer ours as well, but we must also remember that our friends and loved ones want to hear also the good things in our lives. One day not too long ago I was online talking to a good friend that I have known since I was 12, and I told her some somewhat good news and she was so excited that even though I was having a hard time at that particular moment, I was able to smile and I felt so good to be able to confide in someone. I am so blessed to have such good friends in my life. My friends are such an inspiration and good influence on my life :)

I try to bring more More than I can handle (Bring it to the table) Bring what I am able

so lately I have been feeling like I am not doing my share in our household. I am a house wife. I clean and exercise and cook. So why do I feel like I am not doing enough just because I dont have a job? I will tell you why. Because every morning I wake up to the most beautifully handsome man ever. When I look at him I wonder how I was so lucky as to win his heart. Sure he is a bit dorky and a bit of a nerd. But I love him and he is so perfectly imperfect. Our marriage is the type where we can be silly together. I was jumping on the bed the other night and he just laughed. Not at me but because he could see how much fun I was having. We can play games together and we can have serious conversations. Our marriage is built on trust, love, and friendship. How much better can it get. Sometimes I just like to stare at him (until he realizes it and pretends he is psychic). He amazes me in every possible way. I can not wait to have kids with him. I know he is going to be a great father and I know that our family will not be perfect. No family is. But I know that he will help me in any possible way and he will always be there. He brings me flowers when Im sick or upset. He helps me keep the house clean. He makes me so happy. A lot of times I dont think he realizes just how lucky I feel or how happy he makes me. We have had our ups and downs... but what couple hasnt? What is important is that we can get through anything together. :) He is what keeps me sane. And he is someone I can go crazy with. I am so glad that we meet five years ago at EFY. I only hope that every girl could be as lucky as I am :)

All right all right slow down

So it looks as if we are going to be in florida another year. No big deal :) we WILL make it to Utah :) I guess there is just still some things we have to do here first :) Ok so I will be applying for jobs tomorrow. Hopefully I will find one soon :) but my question is to you... how do you talk to someone about an answer to your prayers? Better yet how do you act on this when there is another person involved? hmm not sure. I cant sleep. I have a lot on my mind. A lot has happened. Im sorry I have been updating regularly. I just dont have a really exciting life or a bunch of cute pictures to post :) But I do have a talk on sunday :) Im a little excited an a lot nervous! :) Brian and I are doing great :) I went to the temple last thursday with Rebecca :) that was lots of fun. I enjoyed spending some time with her. We have a new family member. His name is Jasper and he is a hamster. :) He likes me. Brian is scared of hurting him so i am the one who bathes him and holds him :) other than that there is nothing new :)